Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Having Affairs



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We often see a woman in a relationship with a married man. Likewise, the man who in a relationship with a married woman in an affair. Certainly not an ordinary friendship relationship, but rather a loving relationship. The common sense majority will assess negative about relationships of this kind. However, this continues to happen in the community. The development of a permissive society make this affairs being wider acceptance on the community.


What causes this phenomenon occurs constantly in our communities? It will not be easy to answer this question. Some argue that this is because the man does have aggressive tendencies and was not quite the one woman only. For them, a relationship with some women will feel "great". On the other hand, it's about the subconscious condition women themselves, they always feel as subordinate to men.


In this condition, socially, women need a man to rely with. A man who makes her feel comfortable because his protects. No matter how marital status. Moreover, there is no denying that a married man had been smarter to treat women as experience in their marriage. Usually they also established financially.


Maybe it occurs genuine interest between the two. Fell in love with the naturally between both men and women. There are some interests that led to both have had chemistry and the two as could been separated each other. Many things that cause attraction between men and women opposite sex relationships of this kind.



Rethinking


Although the attraction was so strong, a man or woman should brave enough to say "no" to theirselves. Being a third person is not at all easy. We are in a long uncertainty. Till when does this relationship persists for example. Can our affaired people had decided to marry us? Can we face societies rejection about being a second wife? How does the way we deal with his previous wife and children? It was of course we need to think further.



Empathize


Empathy is trying to feel from the others, in this case the man or woman of our beloved legitimate partner. What if it happens to us. Are not our feelings destroyed ?. It was hard to find the fact that our spouse having an affair with someone else. Think also about the circumstances of children of the people we make our affairs. How do they feel? Would not it will interfere with their growth and development of the boys and girls if this relationship persist?.


We should distinguish between empathy with psychologyzing. In behavior, between empathy with psychologyzing is almost the same. It's difficult to distinguish among them. The difference between them is the second intends to take advantage of others for our own benefit.


This writing is truly normative. Perhaps you will tell me thousands reasons why you cheated And it all makes sense. But as a private discourse, this article seems to me quite worthy to considerate.




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(photograph by Emile Seno Aji)

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